Duct Tape Shorts

After a slow start this morning I decided a Starbucks run was in order. Whilst traversing through the Vatican of the Midwest (i.e. Wheaton) I passed a mustachioed gentleman on his morning jog. Our health conscious friend was sporting an old Bears t-shirt and workout shorts that were, I kid you not, the exact color and texture of duct tape. Now, my question is, who makes shorts like that in the first place? And, secondly, what kind of a man, running in Wheaton no less, thinks for a moment that actually wearing them outside the house is remotely okay?