Confession #4

I have never been completely honest with anyone.

Confession #3

I honk and whoop at high school boy's track and cross-country teams when I see them out running: I can't help myself!

The Things We Say When Drunk

Went for margaritas w/ J and CJ last night at our fav watering hole. CJ was in rare form and produced two fabulous quotes, both of which I warned her would appear here (where absolutely no one will read them;-)

#1: " I kissed a guy from Q101....but I have no idea who he was"

#2: "I told him that when he can push an 8 pound baby out his vagina then he can name it"
(said in reference to a discussion she'd had with her bf re: naming their future children)

Post Response

To this point I have received little feedback on the majority of my posts, which is not surprising since I know of only three people who read this even semi-regularly. The crowning insult, however, is that of all the humorous and blindingly insightful posts I have created, the one that received the highest response rate regards my confession of craving White Castle hamburgers on occasion! Come on people! If you're going to post a response at least respond to something quasi-intelligent or mildly humorous!

Confession #2

I drive like a maniac.

Confession #1

There are times when I actually crave White Castle cheeseburgers.

Stood up!

Argh. So last Tue. I met SS and his client M for drinks at the Happy Hamburger. Exhausted and stressed from a long day of presentations at work, followed by teaching, I was feeling just a touch saucy as I entered the restaurant. Over drinks and blackened tilapia (v. good!) I enjoyed getting to know M while making scathing remarks about SS, his behavior and Italians in general. To my utter amazement the more lip I gave him the more attentive and flirtatious he became: go figure! The evening ended with him asking me out to dinner and dancing on Saturday: 4 days in advance! Go Rules!

Unfortunately Sat. rolled around and I had not heard a peep since Tue. from SS. Despite that it is against The Rules (well, I think it is, they don't get that specific) I called and left a vm asking if we were still on for the evening as I assumed we were. Late afternoon he calls to inform me that we are indeed still on but that he is flying back from NY and might be a little later than planned but that he would call when he landed. Yea, that phone call never came!

Despite my fury at having been stood-up on a Saturday night, in the back of my mind I figured something legitimate had come up and, if not, that I was well shod of him anyway. Sure enough, after church Sun. morning, I had a groveling vm awaiting me. Apparently his plane had security clearance issues and he was left sitting on the tarmac for several hours before they were finally cleared for take-off. I suppose this makes sense as he was flying out of NY on 9/10 just a day before the anniversary of 9/11. Since he was flying a private plane, shared by a few others, they had to first fly to Toronto before dropping him off here by which point he did not want to make matter worse by waking me with a phone call in the wee hours of the morning.

To his credit he apologized profusely, said repeatedly that he did not mean any disrespect, that he had really wanted to see me and felt terrible that he couldn't call. He sounded sincere and I chose to forgive but maybe I am just being naive? Feel free to weigh in on this one folks. Of course my gf's bf's have done much worse and they are still together so....???
I will say that SS amended for his mistakes most nicely. He took me shopping, to a movie and dinner throughout which I gave him a hard time about the previous night's debacle and he was a good sport though it all.

Little Wonder...

Driving into work this morning some ditz in a silver Grand AM nearly blind sided me as she attempted to swing down a parking aisle in front of me, effectively cutting me off when I had the right of way. As she whipped around the corner I saw that the front driver's side quarter of her car was severly bashed in: how utterly astounding! I can't believe they give people like her a driver's license!

Life Lessons

The following information might be glaringly obvious to most of you ladies out there. Any of you who know me well, however, understand that I am not a details person and so I learned the following lessons the hard way: through first hand experience.

Lesson #1: Beware of any man who brags about the size of his peepee OR about his prowess in the sack. The bigger the talk the smaller the return, I promise you! If he's packing serious heat and has mad mattress skills he doesn't need to say a word: actions speak louder than words.

Lesson #2: Beware of any man who feeds you the following line, "No one will ever ________ like I did". Two of the more popular versions are, "No one will ever treat you like I did" and, "No one will ever touch you/make love to you like I did". The types of blokes who espouse this rubbish are insecure and subconsciously fear that there are other men out there who can better satisfy you, which is true:-)

My First Toolbox

I am a woman and as such I have tools. To this point my impressive array of Stanley screwdrivers have been housed in an old bluberry carton. This storage issue, however, was rememdied last night. While on a shopping endeavor to Target with mom, I bought my very own toolbox! I now have a place for my hammer, level, metric wrench set and gardening gloves with little carrots on them. Upon bringing my lovely red toolbox home I promptly organized my tools into the compartments and decorated the exterior with Disney princess stickers:-)